Online Relationship Counselor

Simple Lessons For Effective Communication If you have recently ended a relationship and are about to begin a new one, or if you are currently struggling with your partner,   please consider the   following powerful communication messages that I reminded my couple of. Feeling safe with your partner means freedom from being insulted, ignored, rejected, unloved, or in any way diminished. Nothing can be solved unless you listen to your partner and create a feeling of safety. Talk about the problem like you are a team. If you don’t communicate in some way that you have heard each other and considered their concerns, there will be no cooperation. Hurting your partner is hurting yourself (As Gandhi said, “An eye for an eye leaves the whole world blind.”) Dirty fighting includes: ( How many apply to you?)   —   Personal insults Bringing up history to prove a point One-upping your partner Threatening to leave or divorce Lying / half-truths How T...

The relationship model that would slash divorce/breakup rates if more people knew about it. Because with our habit of repeating relationship mistakes and with divorce rates as high as they are…. And with second & third marriages failing even more often than first marriages…. It’s clear that we, as a society, are not addressing the REAL issue here. I don’t think the real issues behind divorce and breakups are money disagreements or sex. I think those are symptoms of the root cause. And that root cause is simply that as imperfect human beings, we often look to our partner,  instead of to ourselves , to correct those imperfections.  If we aren’t intentional about learning from our mistakes and changing our destructive behaviors, we are   doomed to repeat them . A relationship can only be as good as the individuals in it and each partner has a responsibility to be the best they know how. How we (rightfully) expect a lot of our partner, but how we also reli...

In the 4 part video series I have created for you,  Post-Divorce Healing and Rediscovering Your SELF ,  I am going to take you on a journey that will give you crystal clear insight into*:* Why your marriage didn’t work out. How to begin developing a non-partnered identity. The steps to “divorce-proof” your future relationships In Video 1,  we will take a look at identity formation in childhood. Understanding this developmental phase is crucial. You may be surprised to learn that developing an identity as a non-partnered person builds upon and mirrors identity formation in infancy and childhood. Establishing a stronger, more independent Self is a primary focus of your healing. In Video 2,  I will show you how your early childhood development may have hindered you in developing adult intimacy and precisely how you relived that in your relationship. Next, in Video 3,  we will explore those parallels and I will describe the various dynamics and ...

Moving beyond your divorce is not the same as being comfortable in your own skin. This is a brief video to help you demystify the question of “Who AM I Without My Partner _____________________________________________________________________ Post-Divorce Healing and Rediscovering Your SELF   —  This is a 4 part video series that will help you Post-Divorce Healing and Rediscovering Your SELF. Buy Now for Instant Access! Actual Value — $300 Offer value — $97 Offer valid until August 31, 2019 BUY HERE

Over 35 years working in the field of psychotherapy Master’s degree from Columbia University Ph.D. from Union Institute 1995: Co-Founder & President of Choices: A Women’s Center for Mid-Life Development, providing counseling, support groups, professional speakers, author presentations, and conferences to educate and empower women. Consultant to Physicians For Human Rights (PHR), Nobel Peace prize recipients dedicated to helping people whose personal rights have been violated to seek asylum in the United States. Extensive training in: grief counseling, addictions counseling, couples’ counseling, collaborative practice and mediation. Also a Published Author. Who Am I Without My Partner? “Post-Divorce” Healing and Rediscovering Your SELF A book that acts as a beacon of hope either during or after the heartbreak of divorce. In this book, I apply easy-to-understand psychological theory to help you heal from the grief of losing a spouse and confidently def...

Have you ever felt like your relationship was at a standstill? Like you and your partner have hit a wall and keep repeating the same flawed relationship patterns, and can’t seem to move forward? You want to keep going but you don’t know how to get unstuck? This is a very  painful and frustrating  spot to be in. So now what? What’s the move? I can get you unstuck. You don’t have to feel this way anymore. The place you are in is temporary and there is a solution. There’s a reason your relationship isn’t moving forward…. Failed partnerships have reached pandemic proportions and people are clearly in need of new guidance. To address this problem of failed relationships, I have developed a partnership model called  Yours, Mine, Ours: Relationships Done Right. Unlike the existing relationship models which define relationships as being made up of two individuals, my model describes all relationships as consisting of three entities — two individuals (I, You)...

Listen to Dr. Deborah Hecker talking about Divorce ________________________________ Post-Divorce Healing and Rediscovering Your SELF   — This is a 4 part video series that will help you in Post-Divorce Healing and Rediscovering Your SELF. Buy Now for Instant Access! Actual Value — $300 Offer value — $97 Offer valid until August 31, 2019 BUY HERE